Viva Espana!

I just returned from an amazing 10-day trip to Spain and France. My two friends, Nicole and Samantha, and I decided a few months ago that we needed a European vacation and we actually made it happen.  This trip was a much-needed getaway for each of us.  I'm so glad that we took the opportunity to escape reality for a bit and enjoyed exploring new countries and cultures.

 

I don't even know how to begin sharing our experience with you, so I'm going to let the pictures do most of the talking...

 

(this post will be dedicated to the Spain portion of the trip.  I'll post about France soon!)

 

departing Portland International Airport: we traveled light, each only bringing a backpack

 

our street view from our apartment in Madrid: we rented through www.airbnb.com which I highly recommend

catching up with my friend Elizabeth from Waco who now lives in Madrid

amazing statues and architecture everywhere we looked

Nicole enjoying tapas and wine, like a local

Retiro Park

Retiro Park

Palacio Cristal in Retiro Park

 

Samantha and I lounged in the Crystal Palace for a while

Flamenco dancing show

packed up and headed for Barcelona

 

catching the train to Barcelona

 

endless tapas

we lucked out with some pretty great weather

Fat City Bike Tours: my favorite part of our time in Barcelona

such a fun way to explore the city

Catedral de Barcelona

overlooking the city

 

I went for a run one morning in search for this free outdoor rock climbing tunnel - so awesome!

 

we found an amazing Mexican restaurant in Barcelona with legit margs and guac

we met up with some of my cousin Madison's friends from Spain who used to live in Portland

train ride from Barcelona to Nimes

 

Next post will be all about France, the even more wonderful part of the trip!

Walking on Water

I like having control of things.  I like doing things my way.  I like being the one making decisions.  I like thinking that I'm the one keeping things together and that everything is running smoothly because of me.  I don't need any help.  I've got this.

But then a storm comes and rocks the boat.  And all of a sudden I've completely lost control.  Well, I was never actually in control.  I just though I was.

Storms can be scary! Especially when it's dark and there is thunder and lightening and wind. Peter knows what I'm talking about.  Not only was Peter caught in a raging storm, he was caught in a raging storm outside, in a boat, on the water.  Peter was caught in this storm for quite a while, possibly even 4 days.  I can't imagine how terrifying that would be.  And miserably cold, and wet, and exhausting.

I've come across the story of Jesus walking on the water several times in the past week.  It's a story that I can very much relate to right now.  I can relate to Peter in the boat, and I want to be even more like Peter on the water.  Read the story (Matthew 14:24-32) and try to put yourself in Peter's shoes...

"The boat was a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.  Shortly before dawn Jesus went to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the water, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.

But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."

"Lord, if it is you, tell me to come to you on the water," said Peter. "Come," he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came towards Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"

Immediately, Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith, why do you doubt?"  And when they climbed in the boat, the wind died down."

What a powerful story.  A few things I notice when reading this story...

• Jesus came to them out of nowhere, in the most unexpected way.
  Jesus tends to do that, doesn't he?  He hardly ever shows up how I would expect him to.  Sometimes I don't even recognize him and he completely catches me off guard.  But he shows up in my moment of need when I am overwhelmed with fear.  Thank God he shows up.
• FEAR was the dominant emotion in Peter and the disciples.
  How easy it is to live life in fear.  One of the reasons I like to have control is because I think that if I'm in control then there will be less unknowns.  And I often fear the unknown.
• Peter asks that Jesus draw him out to the water, to be with him.  Peter did not ask Jesus to come into the boat.
  This is how I want to be more like Peter.  I usually want Jesus to come into my story and sort things out on my turf.  I don't want to have to step out of my boat and into the waves.  That sounds terrifying.  Stepping out of my story means giving up "control" and stepping into the unknown.  For Peter, stepping out of the boat and onto the water meant completely trusting Jesus.  That is one bold step!  But Jesus calls us into his story.  The invitation is there.  And his story is way better than ours.
• Even after Peter stepped out of the boat in pursuit of Jesus, he took his eyes off of Jesus.
  Deciding to walk towards Jesus is the first step.  But it's easy to lose sight of him, and as soon as we do we start to sink.  Fear and worry seems inevitable for us humans.  The only way to keep fear and worry from drowning us is to try to stay focused and keep our eyes on Jesus.
• When Peter cried out for help, Jesus immediately reached out and saved him.
  Crying out for help is really hard for me to do.  Because it means that I have to come to God in my weakness and ask for help.  This is the point in which I have to admit "I don't have this."  And God looks straight at me and says, "I know.  I've got this."  And all I have to do is take his hand and trust him.  What a relief!
• When they finally climbed back in the boat and were together, the wind calmed down.
  The calm after the storm comes when you hand your worries and fear over to God, follow his lead, and rest in his presence.

This past week has been a tough one for me.  I've experienced a storm of loss and sadness, chaos and confusion, hopelessness and fear.  This isn't the first storm in my life and it definitely won't be the last.  Many storms I've experienced in the past have lasted way too long, because for some reason I decided to sit in the boat with my head down, letting the rain continue to drench me.  I'm so grateful for Peter's example.  He's taught me to look out into the storm and focus on Jesus who is walking towards me with his hand out saying, "Come on out, Mary.  Step out of the boat and onto the water with me.  I've got this."

 

Trusting Jesus

Trusting Jesus is so much easier said than done.  But the truth is, I don't actually want control!  I want to hear God say, "I've got this."  And I want to respond, "If this is what you have for me, ok. I trust you."  Trusting Jesus means fully handing over my fears and stepping into his story without conditions, expectations, or timelines.  So right now I am stepping out of the boat on my own, taking those first shaky steps through the waves, and making my way towards Jesus where I can grab his hand and let him lead me on the water.

I'm kind of obsessed with this song right now:

 

Lincoln City Half Marathon

On Sunday, Robby and I ran the Lincoln City Half Marathon out on the Oregon Coast.  I bet you're thinking, "Oh, beautiful place to run a race!"  The Oregon Coast is a beautiful place, but in March there is a good chance that it is going to be rainy and gray.  And it was 100% rainy and gray on Sunday.

 

We took our place at the start line as the rain began to pick up - this was definitely more than a drizzle.  The rain gave us a nice wet feeling before it let up around mile 3.  Around this point, I made a running buddy: Tom.  We were running at the same pace so I decided to at least say hello and ask how he was doing, which struck up an 8-mile conversation.  Running with Tom was great; it helped me keep a steady pace and the conversation was a good distraction.

 

Although the course didn't run along the ocean, it was still beautiful, set in a wooded area along a nice creek.  A good bit of the first half was a steady incline to about mile 7, where the course then looped back the way it came and the steady decline was very much welcomed.

 

The run was quite enjoyable... until the last 2 miles in which the rain came back with a vengeance, the wind decided to join in, and the course took a nasty uphill turn.  I started having flashbacks to the 2010 Portland Marathon... soaking wet clothes, ratty hair, heavy shoes full of water.  I swear that last mile was more than a mile.

 

I finished in 2:02:48.  Not my best time, and not under my goal of two hours (but again, we have our suspicions that the course was more than 13.1 miles).  Robby finished not too far after.  Our friend Valerie, who traveled out there with us, was at the finish line cheering us in.  We stuck around for the awards ceremony (surprisingly we didn't win our age divisions) and then headed into town for some clam chowder and fish and chips.  The rest of the day is a blur.  Robby and I were pretty beat and just wanted dry clothes and a nap.  But I'm proud of us... not just talking about running a race together, but actually doing it!  #teamcarson

 

the team pre-race

rainy starting line

 

crossing the wet finish line

at least we got medals to prove it!

 

Running in the Rain

 

"There's no such thing as bad weather, just soft people."

-Bill Bowerman, co-founder of Nike

Goddaughter Cecilia

This Sunday I became the godmother to precious Cecilia Anne Schobert.  Cece's parents, Matthew and Camden, moved from Waco to Portland about 3 years ago and they have become like family to me.  Matt was actually one of my youth group leaders at 7th & James when I was just a confused little teenager.  Now he is someone I talk theology and life with over beers as a complicated young adult.  It crazy to think that I have known him for half of my life (which equates to about 1/4 of his life - love you, Matt!).  I've gotten to know Camden since they've lived in Portland, but I've known her family and extended family through various, random Baylor connections.  Cece is now a little over 3 months old, and is lucky to have 2-year-old Trey as her big brother.

 

Little Cece is such a happy baby with the chubbiest, cutest cheeks you've ever seen.  I have yet to see her cry (at least for more than 10 seconds) and she smiles and laughs at the smallest things.  She's a true joy and I am honored to take on the special role of godmother to her, and watch her grow into the beautiful woman God has created her to be.

 

after the baptism ceremony at St James Lutheran

the Schobert family

(poor Trey wasn't feeling well that morning)

godmother Mary, Cece, Camden, Trey, Matthew, godfather Rick (Matt's friend from college who now lives in Denver)

 

the whole crew, including Camden's mom from California, at Petite Provence for brunch after the service

 Cece with the blanket I knitted for her baptism gift

she spit up on it several times which I'm pretty sure is how she shows her love

 



Borning Cry

This is the song that the congregation sang at the end of Cece's baptism.  I love the words - they are a great depiction of the roles of parents and godparents (spiritual "sponsors" of the child) and really the community as a whole which surrounds her.  There have been many people in my life who have rejoiced with me, cheered me on, guided me, and helped raise me as a child of God (and continue to do so!).  My hope and prayer is that I can do the same for little Cece.

I was there to hear your borning cry, I’ll be there when you are old.

I rejoiced the day you were baptized, to see your life unfold.

I was there when you were but a child, with a faith to suit you well;

In a blaze of light you wandered off to find where demons dwell.

When you heard the wonder of the Word I was there to cheer you on;

You were raised to praise the living Lord, to whom you now belong.

If you find someone to share your time and you join your hearts as one,

I’ll be there to make your verses rhyme from dusk ’till rising sun.

In the middle ages of your life, not too old, no longer young,

I’ll be there to guide you through the night, complete what I’ve begun.

When the evening gently closes in, and you shut your weary eyes,

I’ll be there as I have always been with just one more surprise.

I was there to hear your borning cry, I’ll be there when you are old.

I rejoiced the day you were baptized, to see your life unfold.

Snow Days

Two weekends ago Portland got some major snow!  Like 6 inches of white, fluffy, powder snow.  It was beautiful.  And it shut the city down for 3 and a half days.  Snow days are fun, but snow weekends are glorious.  For 3 days, the whole city was forced to stay off the streets and in their homes, or at least their neighborhoods.  I didn't touch my car for 3 days.  If I wanted to get out to go anywhere, I had to walk.

 

The snow weekend was great because it forced me to slow down and just relax.  I knitted, read books, watched movies, cleaned out my closet, went for walks, and played cards with our neighbors.  Once the snow started falling on Thursday, Megan and her roommate Becca (who live in the suburbs) decided that if they were going to be stuck at home all weekend, they wanted to at least be in the city.  So they packed up their bags and came to my house for the weekend, which was perfect because my roommates were both out of town.  I loved just hanging out and doing whatever we wanted to do each day.

 

sometimes we actually did nothing but stare at the snow

 

Laurelhurst Park by my house became a snow park!

When the New Becomes Old

Starting something new is exhilarating, isn’t it? Beginnings are exciting. At the beginning of something, you are full of energy. You put your best foot forward. You’re determined to give your all. You have high hopes and big dreams. This new something is just what you need in your life, because many of the old things in your life are stale and boring.

Think of the first day of school... and all of the time you put into that first-day outfit (I still remember the plaid skort, black collared top and mary jane shoes I wore on the first day of 5th grade).  Think of your new year’s resolution to exercise… you bought new workout clothes and hit the treadmill running (literally, of course). Think of a first date… you curled your hair, put on heels and even wore a little perfume.

 

Beginnings are exciting! But after a while, that excitement fades. The shine wears off. School becomes overwhelming and you can’t wait for summer break. Exercising becomes mundane and going home sounds more appealing than going to the gym. And after a few dates, you’re likely to be in your sweats with your hair in a ponytail when the guy comes over.

 

You’re over it. The new is now old.

 

A friend of mine told me this week that she is thinking of leaving her church, which surprised me because she seems to really love her church. When I asked her why, she said that she’s been at that church for four years now and she’s ready for something new. There’s nothing wrong with the church, she just wants a change.

 

Did you know that the average worker today stays at their job for 4.4 years? And the expected tenure of the workforce’s youngest employees is about half that. My generation tends to stay at one job for about two years before they get tired of it and want to move onto something new.

 

It’s a vicious cycle: try something new, get tired of it, move onto something else.

 

So what do you do when the excitement fades? My hope: Push through. Keep going. I know, that sounds like work.  It isn’t always easy; it’s oftentimes hard. The adrenaline rush is gone, and now you have to find a new source of energy to continue moving forward. It is work, but it’s worth it!

 

Greener Grass

We tend to think that the grass is always greener on the other side. But you can’t just hop over the fence and enjoy your neighbor’s luscious grass. You have to put some time and effort into growing and maintaining your own green grass. I bet your neighbor didn’t get such beautiful green grass by being lazy. They probably took time to water, cut, fertilize and tend to their yard. That’s why their grass is greener.  You have the ability to make the grass on your side just as green!

5 Year Portland Anniversary

Today is my 5 year Portland anniversary. Five years ago today, I arrived in this wonderful but foreign city. It was Super Bowl Sunday and it was raining. The Moores picked me up from the airport, took me by the grocery store to get some necessities for my first week here, and kindly opened up their home for me to live in for the first two months.

 

Here I was: a 22 year old girl from Texas who had just graduated from college, never really lived outside of Waco, and had never even visited the Pacific Northwest. I had no idea what this journey would look like. I didn't know what to expect. But I was open to whatever lie ahead of me and as I look back, I see that this journey has been more than I ever imagined.

 

I have changed, that’s for sure. I have grown immensely. I have learned a whole lot. Here are a few of the pieces of my 5-year journey that I am most thankful for:

• A church home community group that I have been a part of since the first week I moved here: there are six of us from that remaining group that are still very close and get together at least once a month. I am so grateful for these people whom I have known the entire time I’ve lived here.
• “Intentional community”: these are buzz words, I know. But “community” is very much a focus here in Portland. Over these past 5 years, I have learned how to dive deep into relationships in a way that I had never quite experienced before.
• Becoming closer to my family, the Moores: I say this often, but I don’t think I would still living up here in Portland without Steve and Thanne. They are my second family. Being away from my immediate family is very difficult, so having family here to invite me into their home and look after me is a huge blessing. I have spent numerous holidays at the Moore’s home (they even invite me over for Mother’s Day!) and they have been like second parents to me: bringing me food when I’m sick, helping me move houses, picking me up from the airport, going to dinner or coffee with me when I just need someone to talk to, encouraging me and giving me advice to help me through my 20s.
• Unleashing my adventurous spirit: I’ve got 4 marathons, 2 half marathons, 1 triathlon sprint, 5 mountain summits, 5 Hood to Coast races, 5 epic backpacking trips, rock climbing at Smith Rock, bike commuting, and so many ore adventures under my belt. And hopefully this is just the start of a lifetime of adventuring! - An amazing internship at a prestigious foundation which led to a wonderful job at an international nonprofit where I’ve grown professionally for the past 4 and a half years.
• Experiencing some hardships and heartaches of the “real world”, but experiencing more of the joys of life… all which have made me a better and stronger person.
• Building relationships with people who are very different from me: people who see life through a different lens, have a different background and upbringing than myself, those who are homeless, homosexual, of a different faith/religion, a generation or two ahead of me… all of whom I love and have learned so much from.
• Gained a new appreciation and love of amazing cuisine, coffee, beer and wine: Portland is the place to be to become a snob in each of these areas. And I am fully embracing it!

I could say a million other things that I love about Portland and am grateful for over these past 5 years. Thanks to each of you who have supported me here in this wonderful city and from far away. Let the adventure continue!

 

#best5yrsofmylife #iloveyouportland #texagonian #portlandia #livingthedream #westcoastbestcoast #rctid